Mimi, Our Hero

My mom has been a real hero to us these past couple months. She used some pretty un-grandmotherly language when I called from the hospital to tell her I was having some complications, but she recovered quickly and was at my side within 24 hours. She didn't really leave me for the next three weeks, which means she suffered through many sleepless nights and a lot of hospital food.

Here she is with Frances before we left the hospital.



And here she is when she and Sir came back a couple of weeks after Frances was supposed to be born.


I think she was feeling a bit more well rested on the second visit.

Unfortunately, you may not be able to tell how fabulous Frances' outfit is from this picture. It's got holly leaves and black polka dots and is furry. Thank you, Mimi.

We really could not have made it in one piece without her. We are so very, very thankful.

Softness

I've been meaning to get this picture up for weeks now. Martha McNair knit Frances this blanket.


Boston gets a bit nippy. And we can't control our apartment's heat, so it gets a wee bit nippy as well. Mrs. McNair's blanket is coming in very handy. Frances appreciates it. Plus, you wouldn't believe how soft it is. Thank you, Mrs. McNair.

Firsts and favorites

Frances has had many firsts lately - bound to happen to a one month old.

Her first snow! Frances might not have noticed the snow because she was zipped up in my jacket.

Her first church service! A very nice Rite One Evensong, that Frances slept through.

Her first yoga class! The yoga teacher pronounced her "pretty chill," which translates to "asleep" for most of us.

And, most importantly, her first visit with Sir.

You'll notice that she's asleep.

Her favorite activity, when she's awake, is lying on the bathroom counter and staring at whatever is at hand. She can do it for 10 minutes at a stretch - very convenient for when her mother wants to brush her teeth and blow dry her hair. Such a smart baby, keeping mom happy.

An assortment

There's no particular theme to these photos. I just wanted to share them.

I like this first one because you can see how big Mark's hands are compared with Frances.



Frances is looking up at her daddy.

Again with the hands and general sweetness.

Her face is a little blurry, but she's smiling, and sporting an outfit from Shira Ovide. Thank you, Shira!

Happy baby!

This was taken the morning of Frances' four week birthday.

Mark was complaining that there are too many photos of him looking comatose, but he's only home first thing in the morning and last thing at night, so it can't be helped. Only 14 days until the semester is over! We all can't wait.

The Princess and the "e"

One of the best things about this pregnancy, and it was a great pregnancy, was a surprise baby shower that my friends Tara and Beka, and their significant others, threw for me, and Mark and Frances, in semi-abstentia. This is most of the gang here. All these folks went to Bryn Mawr or Haverford. We could send this picture into the alumni magazine, but I promised not to.


Tara and Andrew got me to Beka and Dan's apartment with an embarrassingly simple ruse. At the door to the apartment, I thought we must be in the wrong place because I could hear a bunch of people talking in Beka's apartment. But, no, we were in the right place, as I could see when I got inside and everyone waved hello. Tara later revealed to me that she was a touch dismayed that the guests didn't jump up and yell "Surprise." She decided that that was the difference between my friends and her friends. I think we can generalize a bit more. It's a perfect example of the difference between extroverts and introverts, Bryn Mawr students and Haverford students: Mawrters jump up and yell while Fords sit on the couch and wave. It's also why I felt I had rejoined the mother ship when I went to Haverford.

The activity for the baby shower was brilliant and much better than any other baby shower activity I've ever heard of. Everyone decorated onesies. It kept everyone diverted for hours and I got to go home with a whole new wardrobe for Frances. This is Tara hanging up the onesies to dry.


And now we come to the Princess and the "e." Tara made this onesie that says "Princess." Note the flower on the cuff - it's just precious, I have to say.

And Andrew, believing me when I said this baby was going to be called Ellie, carefully drew this mighty "e" with a sun and stripes. I love it.

Stay tuned for more onesies. There are many more to come.

Everybody needs a tutu

At least, that's what Beka, my college room mate, seems to think.



Beka gave this pink, sparkly concoction to Frances at our surprise baby shower. What's funny, is that she forbade all guests from giving any pastel gifts, but I guess pink and sparkly are okay. My mom, Frances' Mimi, thinks the tutu is spectacular. She wondered if we could hang it on the nursery wall, like a piece of art. I wasn't sure Mark Upton would approve.

Frances seemed unfazed by her spectacular-ness.

Snuggle Time

This is Frances lying on my chest. I love snuggle time...

Frances and James

Auntie Jocelyn and I wanted to get some pictures comparing Cousin James and Cousin Frances. Some of us (Jocelyn, James and Morgan) enjoyed this experience more than others (Frances). I imagine James would have been saying something along these lines, if he could talk:

James: What's this funny little thing crying over here? Don't cry, baby. See, I'll pat your head and everything will be alright.



James, continued: Hmm...You're still crying. Here, try this. It's a yoga pose called The Happy Baby. See how it makes me happy?



Then again, he might be saying something more like this:

James: Run for your life, you naked mole rat! Run for your life!



Works either way, if you ask me, take your pick.

Mammoth!

Frances had yet another weigh-in on Wednesday. The little bruiser is up to 6 lb. 12.6 oz.! She gained seven ounces in five days. All that nursing and pumping and supplementing are paying off! Now we only have to supplement every other feeding during the day. Hopefully we can soon taper off the supplementing at night and get some more sleeping done.

Daddy duty

More from Auntie Jocelyn: Frances is on a three hour feeding schedule, round the clock, of nursing, pumping, and supplementing. Morgan nurses Frances and then pumps. While my mom was here, she gave Frances the bottles of pumped breast milk and formula during Morgan's pumping sessions. But then she went home, and Morgan called on Mark to bottle feed one night. They made it, but this is how they looked in the morning. And yes, that is a dish towel that Frances is wearing!

Two week pictures

Auntie Jocelyn again: We made it to two weeks! Our naked mole rat (but man is she cute!) is doing well. Lots of eating ... lots of sleeping ... and lots of diapers! We went through 5 diapers at one diaper change to get a clean one on her. It was impressive.




Frances is lying on a blanket I knit for her - well, it was started for one of my own children, but Frances ultimately was the reciever.

When asked what Daddy wanted to say about Frances at 2 weeks, he said "beautiful as ever!". Morgan agrees.

Loads of pictures!

Auntie Jocelyn here - Frances's mother is busy lactating. Besides, she misplaced a whole folder of pictures and gave me the mission of finding them. So here they are:

Frances perfecting the art of sleeping.

A sleepy newborn smile - one of the sweetest things in the world.

Squirmy naked pictures:

And look, Frances's cord fell off!

Never say never

I've been warned repeatedly during this pregnancy never to say I'd never do a particular thing as a parent, because that's exactly the thing I'd end up doing. I thought I'd been doing a good job never saying "never," but I do know I said I didn't think I'd ever chart my child's feedings and diapers like I know some parents do. Then I had a preemie. To make sure she's been getting enough calories, I've been recording every feeding and every diaper since Frances' birth. But the charting has paid off! Frances went back to the pediatrician on Monday and, finally, she is gaining back some of the weight she's lost since birth. She now weighs 5 lb. 15.8 oz. and is in good shape. Here she is looking good and chubby.


We have another weighing today. Fingers crossed

The Birth of Frances

I'll try not to make this too gory. On Monday, Nov. 2, I drove myself home from Brooklyn and a wonderful surprise baby shower (pictures to come). I thought I was feeling great, but on Monday night, I started having some problems. I pulled Mark out of a class and told him it was time to go to the hospital. At the hospital, it was decided that Frances would be safer on the outside than in the inside and I was given drugs to get labor going. So from Monday night until Friday at midnight, I looked something like this:



It looks like I'm sleeping, but don't be fooled. I perfected many new skills over the week: deep, patterned breathing; visualizing; walking and showering with an IV and external fetal monitors; enjoying liquid meals; etc.

On Saturday, labor was finally progressing with the help of some more drugs. The midwife broke the amniotic sac around 2 p.m., by about 2:30 p.m. I gave up the idea of child birth without an epidural, and by 8:33 p.m., we had (brace yourselves):

She weighed in at almost 6 lb. 6 oz. and is 18.5" long.

Daddy was very proud...

...and tired...

...and smart (he sent this gorgeous bouquet).

And we think she's perfect, from her surprisingly dark hair to her freakishly big toes!

About Frances' name: I've been telling people for months that we were going to name our daughter Frances Elliott and call her Ellie. Turns out I was wrong. Her daddy held her a few times and decided she felt more like a Frances. Then Mark's parents called to say they'd been calling her Frances. Then my sister reported that names like Ellie and Elle and Ella were terribly trendy. So, "Frances" it is!